Validation, like motivation, is something we all want, and that implies that encouraging us can be really good. Obtaining so much validation, however, also spells doom for ambition.
It feels amazing for others to have you validated. It is sure to put you in a good mood to hear your friends, family members or colleagues tell you how wonderful you are. But here’s the issue: in your life, an overabundance of validation will result in your feeling no longer driven to pursue additional validation. This is an issue because what pushes people to work hard and aspire for their goals is also the need for recognition. So, if you can, ignore unwarranted or given affirmation too much, as it can make you complacent and unmotivated.
In addition, you need to hang out with smarter and more experienced people than you to be successful. This may require you to leave your comfort zone and search for people you believe are more skilled, talented and intelligent than you are. People who can challenge, threaten and educate you are what you’re looking for, because these are the people from whom you’ll learn the most. You’re going to have to put your pride behind and acknowledge that you’re not the best, and concentrate on gaining information from others instead.
Just ask Snoop Dogg and he’ll tell you how important it is to be surrounded by great people. The rapper attributes his long-standing career to being his team’s dumbest person. So if you want to experience success like Snoop Dogg’s, make it your mission to be the group’s “dumbest” guy.
How do you separate yourself from the throngs of those who are hungry for success? Yeah, you need to bend the rules for the right purposes in order to stand out. Being completely present is another way to stand out. Pay heed and listen. It will help you stand head and shoulders above the rest of the competition by focusing on your appearance and violating the rules when necessary.
What happens when you consume unhealthy foods? Well, you compromise your body. Similarly, when you consume negative thoughts, you compromise your mind. Thankfully, positive thinking is a skill we can develop.
People speak negatively about others because it’s a fast-and-easy way of feeling superior momentarily. This negativity, however, comes at a price. First, because unpleasant talks tend to be lengthy and repetitive, such talk is a waste of precious time. Negative talk often keeps other people from recognizing or appreciating you, which in turn would discourage you from understanding and embodying other people’s positive characteristics.
There are only two steps you need to take to educate yourself in positive thinking. The first is to practice stopping saying derogatory things to yourself. Take a negative thought and say it’s a private secret for you. Wait for yourself to be alone, and then whisper it to yourself. The second stage includes totally preventing negative thinking. When you meet a new individual, you can practice this move. Pick out one admirable characteristic right away, such as the relaxed personality of that person. Then remember this trait as the distinguishing feature of that person. This method will train the mind over time to search out only the positive aspects.
Having strong principles would be beneficial on the road to success, in addition to thinking positively. The author does not mean a jumble of abstract notions that you kind of believe in by “clear values”; she means actionable moral guidelines that you can mention in a personal manifesto. So just jot down the list of ideals that you want to live by and add to it if there is a new one. An instance of a value may be to refrain from joining in on gossip.
You need to learn it by heart in order to bring the belief system into motion. This implies reading your list once a week, and regular reciting your beliefs to yourself. The foundations for a meaningful life are simple principles, so take a pen and paper and write your manifesto!
Will working hard and being sweet pay off? Or is the saying true, and do nice guys finish last, really? It can pay off to be sweet, but you need to be proactive about it. Niceness means many things: laughing, respectfully behaving, being careful, and leaving the last piece of cake. But you need to be proactive if you want to be kind as a bawse, which means consciously thinking and acting in ways that will make an impact. You need to make “being nice” a regular activity on your to-do list in order to do this.
Lastly, you need to encourage what you enjoy if you want to generate change. There is no permanent impact of bashing on what you dislike. You need to find ways to build true, long-lasting change instead. A strong base of hard work, discipline and values is needed to become a good and confidence-exuding bawse. Over time, in this success-optimizing way, you will be able to train your mind to work effortlessly.
A tip you could try out. Align the spirit, body, and mind. All the players in your team are your mind, body and soul. For you to be and work at your best, all three need to be in harmony. Ask yourself, are there stuff you continually feel bad about to decide whether you’ve lost synchronicity? Or are you struggling to do stuff that you think you’re going to do? If so, then you need to take a moment to realign your team to make sure that your thoughts, actions and feelings work in harmony.
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